life has been happening at an insane rate. in the past two weeks, i’ve had two family graduations, two family weddings, watched my best friend become a mother and celebrated the life and grieved the death of my papaw. all of this on top of what has already been an emotional year of growth and challenge. and in the midst of it, i am preparing for something so much greater than myself. in one month, i’ll be going with a team from sweet sleep to northern uganda to distribute beds to orphans for ten days. i am already completely humbled by the opportunity to go and serve in such a tangible way. and if i’m honest, i’m scared as well. i’m scared because i’m a wife and mother and being on the other side of the planet from my boys is…well, scary. i’m scared because i know that with all the prayer, the team meetings, the information i’m learning about the place i’m going, the history of it and it’s people, i still know that i won’t possibly understand it until i see it with my own eyes, and even then, i’ll never fully comprehend what the people i’ll be meeting have been through. how could i?

so, you’re probably asking if i’m so completely terrified of something, why i am going? the answer is quite simple, really: i have to. not because i’m brave (pretty sure i’ve proved that point in this post), not because i’m trying to be a good person, or that i want to go to africa (gulu is not exactly a tourist hotspot). i’m going because i know without a doubt god is telling me to go.

one of my favorite hymns is come thou fount and there’s a line that says, “prone to wander, lord i feel it. prove to leave the god i love. here’s my heart, o, take and seal it. seal it for thy courts above.” prone to wander—that is me. for the past 3 years, god has been burdening my heart with the mission of sweet sleep. slowly, he has broken my heart for his children and now, here i am and he’s calling me to go. i’ll admit, this isn’t the first time i’ve felt led to do something that truly scared me, it’s just the first time i’ve been willing to obey.

please take a few minutes and watch the video above. join me in praying for our team as we prepare to go and serve. and most importantly, pray for the people of northern uganda.